MM Racing Chapter 310 There is no point in being tough on yourself
Chapter 310 There is no point in being tough on yourself
When Bai Zhi woke up for the first time, she was in her own spiritual space. She had been to this place countless times, reviewing her memories again and again in the deep sea of memory, trying to find the best solution among countless failures.
This was something she experienced often when she died.
Her sudden appearance here means that the body outside is dead again.
From the outside, it seemed that after Baizhi died, the computer would restart within a few seconds just like restarting a computer, but this process was extremely long for Baizhi.
Memories played over and over in her brain, appeared in the space around her, vying to appear in front of her eyes and penetrate into her brain.
This process is even difficult for Baizhi herself to control.
Amuro Toru guessed correctly. Bai Zhi's resurrection after death would also come at a price. She would have to experience all the pain again and again, abandon all emotions and feelings, sort out her memories, and constantly confirm her goals so as not to get lost in the torrent of memories.
Otherwise, you will become a complete lunatic.
Where am I now?
Baizhi wanted to go back quickly.
Although this body is indestructible to ordinary people, a god of memory whose strength is unclear suddenly appears.
This God of Memory is countless times stronger than the three gods Bai Zhi killed. His strength is unfathomable. Bai Zhi cannot imagine what means she has. Can she take back his cursed body?
[You are at Conan's house. He must be scared by you.]
A familiar voice floated beside her, and Bai Zhi recognized it as her own voice.
[You were running away with the little protagonist, but fainted on the way. Of course the little protagonist had to pick you up.]
"You shouldn't have used your power to buffer the entire train. You should have just saved Ling." Bai Zhi's voice was cold, without a trace of ups and downs: "If you hadn't suddenly become compassionate, you should have brought Ling out and got the golden gem. Then we could have merged and fought that god."
[If you still act arrogantly and stubbornly in front of me, you will be punished by God. ]
A chuckle floated in the air.
[So, you want him to know that the lives of all the people on this train are your planned burial objects? ]
[Or do you want him to just survive, to experience the feeling of powerlessness of trying your best but not being able to save others, to have to watch a trainload of people die, and then to stay with them for three days feeling guilty?]
Bai Zhi: "..."
[No matter which one, it sounds so unacceptable. 】
"What we want is the result." Bai Zhi covered her eyes, feeling somewhat powerless: "We have to go back and reverse the flow of time, and go back to that world. The prophecy has already come to a conclusion, and this time we can achieve our goal..."
[If I didn't help you, you would still do the same as me. As expected, we always blame ourselves. ]
"I am the most rational part that has been separated. I must stick to my ideas in order for us to succeed."
[You always like to use the word rationality. It’s ok to deceive others, but don’t deceive yourself. ]
【I am you. 】
Bai Zhi: "..."
[Have you forgotten how I was born? And why I was abandoned? ]
[Sacrificing me allows you to be independent and better fight against time. We know that feelings will affect the future, and you feel that you must follow the established route step by step to succeed. ]
"Is not it?"
[But I woke up. The torn me was unconscious. It was your indulgence that allowed me to take root and sprout again.]
Do you know what I saw first?
[Xiao Ling grabs your hand and asks you why you always want to escape. ]
[After that, countless times of intimacy, countless times of love, countless times of choice, you actually subconsciously chose me. If the law enforcer hadn't appeared and made you firm again, you wouldn't have noticed my existence at all.]
[If those gods hadn't come to cause trouble, you would have merged with me without even realizing it. ]
【Don’t you understand yet? 】
[Bai Zhi just likes Furuya Ling. No matter whether it is before or after she gives up her feelings, Bai Zhi will always like everything again because of Ling's love. 】
Bai Zhi: "Stop talking..."
[You think you are rational, but it was your own choice to have an encounter with him, give up his soul, develop feelings for him, and stay with him, allowing my originally vague shadow to become clearer and clearer.]
[Why do you regret? What are you afraid of? Why don't you want to merge with me? Why don't you want to accept me? ]
Bai Zhi: "Stop talking!"
[You are not the type who would think of such boring excuses as “I have occupied this body for so long, why should another personality take the credit?” We all know clearly what kind of people we are, and it is meaningless to be stubborn to ourselves. ]
Bai Zhi fell silent. A person who looked exactly like her was standing opposite her, but with every word she said, the person who originally seemed imaginary became more and more real.
Finally reaching out to her.
[Okay, let's go, keep running, don't stop here. ]
Yes, we have to run and overcome this damn fate.
[We have defied fate so many times, this time won't be a big deal, our hearts are still in Xiao Ling's hands.]
[If you really want to be tough with yourself, how about just pretending that you are trying to take our core? ]
[For example: I didn’t go there to save him. I just went there to get my core, so I just did it for the sake of convenience~]
"If you hadn't insisted on protecting that carload of people, you would have come out with Zero by now."
[Yes, yes, it's all my fault. Cleaning up for yourself is an essential step. You have to find a way to wake up quickly. Don't you know how anxious that little boy is? ]
"Little boy, you mean Conan?"
[What else? You kidnapped someone to be your disciple, made them develop feelings for you, and then threw them away after using them? During the time you were unconscious, this guy used his elementary school body to carry you on his back for an hour, and you were only found by Mao Lilan on the roadside.]
This kid...
Well, although it was expected, I was still touched.
In that case, just take care of Conan a little. After all, this guy cares about her so much.
"I can accept you and merge with you, but you can't be soft-hearted." Bai Zhi sighed as if compromising, and finally reached out and held the hand of the other self: "The power of the God of Memory is too terrifying. We can't face it. We must leave immediately."
Although there had been crises before, with the arrival of two law enforcers and a god, this was all within Baizhi's acceptable range.
Bai Zhi has a line in her heart. Within this line, she can do something extraordinary without affecting her future.
But the person who suddenly appeared this time was really beyond Baizhi's expectations. She had traveled through so many worlds, and most of these worlds were dissatisfied with God. Baizhi collected their voluntarily dedicated souls and their wills.
Plus the strength accumulated over such a long period of time.
In the end, Bai Zhi tried her best, even at the cost of self-detonation and sacrificing her life, but she only managed to escape.
She is not yet strong enough to fight against this God of Memory that suddenly appeared, so her plan has to be disrupted and started over.
Originally, Bai Zhi thought that it wouldn't take much time to accompany an ordinary person for a lifetime. After all, she had lived for so long and didn't care about the life of an ordinary person.
Stay and take a rest occasionally, and try to accept the love of an ordinary person with Zero, and stay in the world of ordinary people for a while...
It can also be regarded as satisfying my own little selfish desire.
Once, just this once...
But the current situation did not allow her to hesitate any longer, she had to leave as soon as possible.
Leave this world, escape God's lock, and reincarnate into that world as quickly as possible.
If you succeed, you can take everyone home.
But if she fails this time too, it is very likely that she will die, killed by God, just like the future in the crystal ball.
But why, the future in the crystal ball was clearly beautiful? Although she died, she had a smile on her face. If she was killed by God, she would definitely be unwilling.
Why……